IN THE MARGINS: How to fail forward

By Tony Martin
Editor

Failure has a way of getting into our heads if we’re not careful.
It sneaks in through the side door, whispering things like “You’re not enough” or “You’ll never get it right.” Left unchecked, those whispers can settle into our bones and freeze us in place.

But here’s the truth: failure isn’t the end.
In fact, failure can be a beginning — if we let it.

Failure is actually one of God’s most unexpected tools. Not because He delights in our crash-and-burn moments, but because He knows how to use even the messiest situations to move us forward.
The question isn’t whether we’ll fail (we all do).
The real question is: what will we do after we fail?

If you’re like me and you want to fail forward, not fall flat, here are 7 steps that can help — all soaked in grace and grit:

1. Own It Without Excuses

The worst thing we can do with failure is pretend it didn’t happen.
Blaming others, minimizing it, or trying to spin it just leaves us stuck.
Instead, just own it.
“Yep, that didn’t go the way I planned. That’s on me.”
It’s not about beating yourself up — it’s about being honest.
God can’t heal what we keep hiding.

“Whoever conceals their sins does not prosper, but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy.” (Proverbs 28:13)

2. Learn Every Possible Lesson

Failure is a better teacher than success ever will be.
Success feels good, but failure makes us grow up.

Ask yourself:

• What assumptions did I make that were wrong?
• Where did I get careless?
• What can I do differently next time?

God often uses failures to deepen our wisdom. But we have to be willing to sit in the classroom long enough to hear the lecture.

3. Refuse to Let Failure Define You

Failing at something doesn’t make you a failure.
Period.
Your identity isn’t tied to your latest mistake — your identity is tied to Christ.
When God looks at you, He doesn’t see a big fat label that says “LOSER.”
He sees His beloved child, worth redeeming.

Don’t let a single chapter define the whole story.
Your story isn’t over. Not by a long shot.

4. Surrender the Outcome to God

One of the sneakiest traps after failure is trying to double down and “fix it” yourself.
But sometimes the best thing you can do is simply surrender:
“Lord, I blew it. I give it to You. Help me move forward Your way, not mine.”

God has a way of redeeming even the pieces we don’t know how to pick up.
Our job isn’t to force a perfect outcome — it’s to trust Him with the outcome.

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28)

5. Stay Humble, Stay Teachable

Nothing builds humility like falling flat on your face.
And that’s a good thing.

Humility keeps us close to God.
Humility keeps us growing.
Humility keeps our hearts soft enough to learn, even when it’s painful.

The people who truly move forward after failure aren’t the cocky ones who pretend it didn’t matter. It’s the ones who stay teachable, tender, and willing to change.

6. Take a New Step, Even If It’s Small

Don’t wait until you feel ready.
Don’t wait for perfect conditions.
By God’s grace, take a small step forward.

Apply for the next opportunity.
Apologize to the person you hurt.
Sign up for the class you need.
Pick up the broken pieces and start building again.

Movement matters.
Tiny steps of obedience create momentum — and momentum beats perfection every time.

7. Remember That God Specializes in Comebacks

If you don’t hear anything else today, hear this: God delights in redemption stories.
The Bible is full of people who messed up royally — and God still used them in mighty ways.

Moses murdered a man — and ended up leading a nation.
Peter denied Jesus — and ended up preaching to thousands.
David committed adultery — and was still called a man after God’s own heart.

If you think your failure is too big for God to handle, think again.
He’s not done with you.
Not even close.

Here’s the bottom line:
Failure will either sideline you or sharpen you.
It’ll either paralyze you or propel you.
It all depends on whether you’re willing to hand your failures over to God — and trust Him to do something miraculous with them.

Don’t waste your failures.
Let them teach you, humble you, shape you, and by God’s grace, launch you.

You can fail — and still move forward.
In fact, sometimes the best way to move forward…
is to fail forward.